On this episode of The Fresh Start Family Show, Wendy is joined by her inspiring friend Robin Long, who is the founder and CEO of Lindywell (formerly the Balanced Life) which features classes and programs that transform women from the inside out to feel good in their bodies. She’s also the author of Well to the Core: a Realistic, Guilt-Free Approach to Getting Fit and Feeling Good for a Lifetime.
With a focus on wellness and feeling strong and empowered, this episode will encourage you to take a fresh look at your own wellness routine and how it influences our kids’ perspective on healthy living as well. You’ll walk away with ideas on how to live a truly balanced life, so you can thrive as a family!
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Episode Highlights:
- Focus on feeling strong, healthy and energetic so we can live life to the fullest (vs ‘Am I good enough’? ‘Does someone think I look good in this’? etc)
- Influencing our kids with healthy verbiage and an intention of feeling strong + energized is powerful as they form their self image
- We will have less anxiety and perfectionism that comes from comparing bodies by feeling good inside our own bodies when we take care of our mind and body
- It’s also important to our to protect and care for our digital health and wellness by taking breaks and intentional time away from screens
- Embrace the different seasons as parents, especially when our kids are little and demanding of our time
- Building in consistent pockets of quiet brain breaks to support our nervous systems is so important to our mental and physical health
- When our body is under high stress / burnout, high impact exercise actually is a stressor on our system and does more harm than good
Resources Mentioned:
Instagram @wearelindywell
Instagram @robinmarielong
Grab a copy of her new book Well to the Core: A Realistic, Guilt-Free Approach to Getting Fit and Feeling Good for a Lifetime
Grab Your FREE 1 Week Trial at Lindywell Here! (**previous 14 day free trial no longer available, but enjoy the 7 day free trial, you’ll fall in love with Lindywell workouts & resources!)
Not able to listen or want to read along with us?
Here is the episode transcript!
This episode is brought to you by the Fresh Start Family Freedom to Be Personal Liberation Program taking place online October 14th and 21st seats are extremely limited due to the advanced healing and personal development nature of this course. So there’s only 20 seats available in total. And at the time of this recording, we only have a hand full left. So if you’re interested in pouring into yourself, healing from your past, breaking free from limiting beliefs and taking charge to create the life and family legacy of your dreams, head to freshstartfamilyonline.com/freedomcourse to learn more.
Or if it’s easier for you, you can just shoot me a DM over on Instagram. I’m @freshstartwendy with the word summit and I’ll personally send you a message with the link to learn more about this growth summit called Freedom to Be. But just hurry because seats are limited.
Wendy:
Well, hey there listeners and welcome back to a new episode. I’m your host, Wendy Snyder positive parenting educator and family life coach and I’m so happy that you are here today on the show. I am thrilled to have Miss Robin Long, who is the founder and CEO of Lindywell, which is just an incredible pilates and balanced living program, community app, all the things I I myself have been a member now for, gosh, it’s been I think seven years as you’ll hear us talk about in this episode. I found Robin and her incredible program and approach to wellness back when I had been hit by an urchin when I was surfing in Mexico and had to have foot surgery to re, to remove this nasty little urchin spine from my foot.
And I couldn’t jog, I couldn’t surf. And I discovered pilates through the recommendation of a friend and have just watched as Robin has developed this program into really just a worldwide wellness community and program. And I just am so inspired by her. So today she came on to talk about her new book that she is releasing into the world And. it was just an honor to have her on the show. I just love what she’s all about, and we had a great conversation around how to build How to Live, a Balanced Life as a Parent, as well as all the details about her new book So. I’m really excited for you guys to listen and get to know Robin.
And the coolest thing is, is Robin is offering our community a free 14 day trial where you will get to experience their approach of Pilates at the core nourishment, not restriction and a thriving mindset all at your fingertips in your house or through your phone. They have just an easy to use, beautiful app that I love and also all of their workouts and their recipes and their breathing techniques and all the things that they teach and advocate, advocate for over at Lindywell is all available online. So it’s an incredible opportunity to get to know how Lindywell can support you and it’s free.
It’s just such a kind offer for them to do that for this community. So if you wanna take Robin and her team up on that incredible offer, you can head to freshstartfamilyonline.com/lindywell. All right, family, well, excited for you, get you to get to know Robin and hear this conversation about How to Live a Balanced Life as a Parent. Without further ado, help me welcome Robin to the show.
Stella:
Well, hey there, I’m Stella. Welcome to my mom and dad’s podcast, the Fresh Start Family Show. We’re so happy you’re here. We’re inspired by the ocean, Jesus and rock and roll and believe deeply in the true power of love and kindness. Together we hope to inspire you to expand your heart, learn new tools and strengthen your family. Enjoy the show.
Wendy:
Well hey there families and welcome to a new episode of the Fresh Start Family Show. I am so excited to be here today with Miss Robin Long from Lindywell. Welcome to the show Robin.
Robin:
Thank you. I’m so excited to be here.
Wendy:
Oh, I am really thrilled to be having this conversation with you, Robin. I don’t know, but you are like literally a very important person to me and to this organization because you really were the one that sparked the entire creative like process behind like maybe I could create a membership that’s online to support parents all over the world to end like generational cycles and be empowered and learn firm kind connection based parenting strategies and do it in a way where they just learned a little bit month after month and present it in a way that’s like beautiful and engaging and fun.
And I don’t even know how I found the Balanced Life back then, but you were the one that I looked at and I was like, I wanna do exactly what she’s doing. And
Robin:
I love that.
Wendy:
And I reached out to your team and you And I was like, I know this sounds crazy, but would Robin ever like counsel me on like how she started her business? And some odd reason you said yes and you sat with me and I’ll never forget you were like in a co-work at the time and you just sat and you were like Wendy, you asked me whatever you want, I’ll tell you whatever you wanna know. And you told me about everything from where I need to go learn how to build an online course, the how to build your own custom website, like the person to contact to just everything under the sun. And I basically followed like 80% of your advice and build built this organization based on your inspiration and your encouragement.
Robin:
That makes me, I’m so happy that happy because about, I am so grateful for the work you are doing. So the fact that I had any role in that just makes me so happy. And I, remember exactly where I was sitting. I remember that little co-working booth that I was in. I remember our conversation so clearly. So it really impacted me and stuck with me too. So, and I’m just so thrilled for the fact that you took that you ran with it and now are impacting families all over. Like it’s incredible what you’ve built. So
Wendy:
Oh, thank you And. it really is And. it brings tears to my eyes because there’s a lot of people that would’ve just been like, no. And for some reason you said yes, And, it just changed like the entire future trajectory for me. And so And, we still to this day share like basically our custom website and tech designer and manager, our beloved Ted who lives in New York, but we share that and he manages both of our websites and your website and your whole organization and your brand is just so beautiful and all the things. So let’s actually get into that. Robin, will you tell listeners, tell us just a little bit about your story. So when I found you, you had built the Balanced Life and then it became Lindywell.
So just tell us a little bit about your background and what caused you and inspired you to build this beautiful wellness organization.
Robin:
Yeah, well I won’t take the whole episode to tell the story, but I began my career in Health wellness Fitness as a Pilates instructor. So for years I had an interest in health and fitness. There’s a whole backstory around my journey, which I, I talk about quite a bit. My struggles with body image, my unhealthy relationships with exercise and food that I didn’t even really recognize as an unhealthy ’cause it was just quote unquote normal. And for me, Pilates was something that really impacted my health, my wellbeing, my outlook, the way I related to my body to food. So many things. So I decided to pursue it as a career and So I spent a couple of years just building my in-person business as you would as a fitness instructor, working long hours and every time my husband And I moved, I had to start up a new clientele.
I had to, I would leave all of my beloved clients who I’d really built these relationships with and have to start over So I started thinking how could I reach more people and how could I keep working with some of these clients when I relocate or when we move and So I started filming Pilates workouts on my iPhone in my little 700 square foot apartment and figured out how to send them via email to people. And this was about, gosh, I don’t even know, 14 years ago, 13 years ago now and started running programs online way before that was like a thing and happening. Yeah, So I was just kind of making it up as I went, but really loved it. People kept coming back and then it eventually evolved.
I started a blog to go along with it that was called The Balanced Life and evolved into a community and a membership and a membership area on our website that evolved into an app. And then as of last year, we rebranded the company, we’re now Lindywell and it’s been an incredible journey, but so much of my heart, and we’ll get into this I’m sure in our conversation today with Health and wellness was I really wanted to make a change in the health and wellness industry. So I very quickly as a Pilates instructor recognized really some of the problems with the fitness industry and with the diet industry and the health industry that really keeps women stuck, keeps all people stuck.
But I tend to focus primarily on some women related issues as there’s a lot of pressure to look a certain way, to have a certain aesthetic to pursue health for physical appearance as the primary motivator. And I really struggled with that. And I realized I could be a part of the problem if I stay in the fitness industry. And, I, keep going the way I’m going. Or I could be a part of the solution and try to change the message of what it means to really be well. And so really that’s been my motivator for the last decade of building out the Balanced Life and now Lindywell and continuing to try to reach as many people as possible and support them on their wellness journey.
Wendy:
Oh, and you’ve done a fantastic job of doing it. And I know we have so many members that are part of the Fresh Start Experience that also have a Lindywell membership and are just thriving based on the things that you teach inside of there and all the good stuff. And, it really does. Like obviously 93% of our listenership is moms, right? We have 7% guys, which we’re like, yes, heck yeah. The dads are, yes they’re there. Great, you know those 7% dads. But this is such an important conversation for the moms because it’s like challenging that status quo all around all fronts, right? Like and when it comes to wellness and health, it ties so into the things we challenge as far as the status quo with parenting and the way kids should behave and instant obedience and things like that.
But to be able to build that muscle of like, hey, let’s really not just think this is normal, but let’s like really build up something that’s gonna provide true wealth and, I’m sorry, true health and wellness. I combined those two. Not wealth – wealth too because wealth comes when you’re healthy and well. But true health and wellness for like a long time, right? Like which just creates such a beautiful legacy when you live a life that’s truly filled with health and wellness, So, I love it. And I, love that you’re a challenger like me. Yes. Right.
Robin:
And I’m a mom of four too. So I should add that in there as a parent. And I had four kids age five and under not that long ago, just about five years ago. So my kids are now just, they all just had birthdays, So, I have to make the shift. We have ten eight and our twins just turned five. So
Wendy:
How is that possible when other people have kids, the time goes so fast. I’m like, it was just yesterday you were pregnant and now they’re five,
Robin:
They just started kindergarten, they’re barely five. So, but I, with that I also recognize a lot of the challenges and a lot of what I was building was I was building it during this season of being just overwhelmed by little people in the house and a lot of the fitness programs that I saw, A), I couldn’t get to the studio B) I didn’t have the budget to get to the studio and pay for Pilates classes or private sessions or anything. And then a lot of these online things I was seeing at the time were saying like two workouts a day and 45 minutes at a time, an hour at a time. And. I was going, that is impossible for me. And so that’s when I really recognized like there I had this whole all or nothing approach to health and wellness and all of a sudden when I was in this season of busyness with motherhood and parenting, I, it was not, it was gonna be nothing if I couldn’t figure out a way to break through how to adapt this in this new season to really take care of myself.
And so that’s a part of the journey as well. And just wanna make sure I share that because I know as moms or dads when our time is limited And, we have so many needs around us every day taking care of our own health and making time for that can seem like a luxury and seem impossible. So I’m really passionate about making it accessible and realistic for busy people.
Wendy:
So yes, it’s so true, right? Like to creating that consistency, which we’re gonna talk about and then the accessibility. Like sometimes I do think I’m taking crazy pills when I’m like, I wanna build a low cost membership and like have thousands and thousands. Every mentor under the sun is like, you need to raise your prices. I’m like, no, I want this to be accessible for all And. it really is when you can get it into as many hands as possible who are able to create that consistency and realize that it’s as much as we wish it would. It’s not all gonna happen overnight. And you have to find something that you love the journey and you find joy in the every day and find a team of helpers and mentors, whether it’s wellness or parenting, whatever it is, but just to create that consistency, So I, love that.
But we’re gonna get to more about consisting to see in a minute. Let’s talk about this new book. Robin, you’ve got a new book coming out this week. Congratulations.
Robin:
Thank you. This is, yeah, people say it’s like a baby So I think this is like my fifth baby. Yes. It has been such a journey to this book and I’m so excited to finally have it out. So it’s very,
Wendy:
and what’s it called?
Robin:
Very celebratory. It’s called Well to the Core. And so it’s exactly that. Really trying to cut through the noise in the health and wellness space. I think we have more access to information than we’ve ever had. There are more health and fitness experts on platforms everywhere you look. And it’s hard to know what is true and what is actually going to help us help And. I just spoiler alert on this book, it’s not sexy, it’s not the latest bad, it is not the newest trend And, it is not a quick fix. However it is proven, the concepts in there, I break down 10 core components of what it really means to be well are backed, they are realistic, they are sustainable.
And sometimes we get caught up in trying to think what’s the next thing I have to do? What’s the latest trend? What’s the thing everyone’s doing? And, we all have been on that journey of whether it’s yo-yoing or starting and stopping something like that is we can all relate to that and it’s nothing to feel guilty about. It’s actually just an opportunity to say, hmm, if that approach isn’t working, And, we know that 98% of diets fail, right? So if this approach of kind of this starting and stopping and this all or nothing isn’t actually making us any healthier or helping us to make any progress and it’s time for a different approach.
Wendy:
And that’s what I’m really diving into in this book is breaking down some of the myths and the lies that we have maybe inherited over the years when it comes to health, fitness, exercise, our bodies, weight loss. And then once we’ve broken down some of those lies and reframing things moving into what does it mean to move well, what does it mean to nourish our bodies? What are some of these components that are actually neglected in health and fitness programs like breathing and sleeping and resting and having rhythms of rest. And so there’s a lot in there, but I hope that it would be a realistic and encouraging guidebook for people who wanna make real, genuine, sustainable changes in their life and not have to overhaul everything in order to see progress.
Heck yes, I love that. Those two words, realistic and sustainable. And listeners, Robin is not kidding when she says like the, a lot of her resources are like 20 minutes and it’s one of those things that like anybody can fit in 20 minutes and now, I mean I shouldn’t say that, but it’s like it’s easier for most people to fit in 20 minutes, right? And now you have all these amazing resources in the program and I’m sure you talk about the importance of these other things in the book too, but like the breathe, the addition of the breathing stuff. Yeah. In the Lindy, well membership now is just phenomenal. But just to make it like easy to learn and have it be short and sweet.
So it is realistic I think is just such a beautiful thing that you’ve focused on and and is just so, so encouraging. So, I. Love that. And when it comes to this new book, Robin, so you mentioned you have four kiddos and what, like why was this book or was this book important for you as you thought about reading it to them someday? Yeah, And, I wanna hear like, ’cause you have girls and boys, right? So, I wanna hear like a little bit about why it’s important for your girls, why it’s important for your boys. Yeah. Even like, and then I wanna ask you about like husbands and moms too. But let’s start with why is this important for your kids?
Robin:
Yeah. As I am raising kids and Wendy, I know you’ll be able to relate to this in a lot of ways is I wanna prepare my kids in the best way possible to navigate what life is going to throw at them, right? Or whatever challenges they may come up against. And so my goal as a parent is to set them with a solid foundation so that when they do go out into high school and they do go out into college, they have the tools that they need to thrive and to be resilient and to take care of themselves. And that can look a lot of different ways. So when I think of my girls, and this is for boys too certainly, but I think back on my own childhood, And, I, think of my body image challenges and my struggle with never being, feeling good enough in my body.
Feeling like I always had to change my body to achieve a certain idealized look or comparing myself to other girls, the size of my thighs, the size of my ankles, the size of my knees. Like the most random things that I would compare to other kids. And so certainly providing a foundation of positive body image and almost even just learning to appreciate our bodies and appreciate our health with a new lens. So a lens that is not just focused on how you’re gonna look in your jeans, if somebody’s gonna compliment you and tell you you look cute, but really for the gift that it is to take care of your body and how much stronger you feel and how much maybe more energetic you feel or these different areas in every video that we do at Lindy, well the language is all intentional to, you might hear one fitness program that’s saying, oh work hard to you know, burn off last night’s dinner.
Well that is not the messaging that is healthy for anyone to be receiving. And so we don’t want our members to be receiving more of those messages. And, we also don’t want the little ears around to be listening to the workout. Yeah. That their mom is doing and thinking, oh I guess that’s what I have to do too. Right? So all of the language focusing on why are we doing this so that we have strong legs so we can feel strong and energetic in our body, And we can go out and live life and do the things that we wanna do. That’s what it’s really about. So there’s that whole component of it and there’s also the mental health component of it. So this book really embraces not just physical health but also the importance of mental health.
And. we know that this is impacting our kids at an alarmingly increasing rate. I mean I know you feel this and it’s drives your work and the way you support families. It’s really alarming what our kids are dealing with when it relates to mental health. So that is another big component. I’ve been walking through anxiety with one of my kids at a pretty severe in seasons and having the tools and teaching kids these breathing techniques, these somatic exercises, these ways to understand how can I support my body, support my brain, support my health and wellbeing so that I can show up and function as the best version of myself has has been huge.
Wendy:
And if we don’t learn that as parents, we can’t provide that for our kids, right? So my goal is really if we support parents in their health and wellbeing journey, this all can flow down to the next generation as well. And, I feel so grateful in those moments when I’m sitting with her on the bed, navigating a panic attack and getting that I can, we can do these breathing exercises, And, we have tools, And it works, And it stops the panic and we’ve got, and so just feeling empowered in that is something I’m very passionate about providing for myself and other parents and families. Oh my gosh, that’s so beautiful Robin.
And yes, you have been such a great inspiration for me over the years. Just like the positive like mentorship and who you are and how you speak and teach and present in the world. But it’s not like a fluffy fake over the top. It’s like, it’s very realistic, but the language we use and the way we even correct ourselves, especially now that we have these little ones in front of us, like yeah, it really is so important. And my daughter is almost 16 now and as a beach volleyball athlete and you know,
Robin:
Okay, so in my mind your daughter’s probably like my daughter’s age now, right? Like she should be 10. I think in my mind that’s, and that’s somehow I have a 10 year old and she’s 16. Like I don’t know, it’s wild.
Wendy:
It’s like other people’s kids. You’re like no time can’t be that gone by now. No, but it is, it’s amazing to watch her journey And, we wait, we make our kids wait till high school to have a phone, an iPhone. But it’s still, even at ninth grade it was like heartbreaking to have it be a thing and we’re just navigating that. But I do you just know that like the comparison thing is just something now that we never had to deal with and yeah, the level of just everything that it’s adding is just intense. But I know just the other day Stella said something she said, she says that she’s been, I love it. She’s like be becoming so in love with exercising. In addition to her beach volleyball workout, she has started to do like strength, strengthen agility training at her volleyball club.
And it’s so fun to see her falling in love with making her body strong. Oh but I’m just like watchful. eye. Yeah, just praying through every day like okay cool, this is that age right where you can see if it starts to get off course at all. And you just, and so far it’s been amazing. But she did say one day something about like, well like I think she almost asked me, she said something like, okay then I like have this like thing now, right? It was like it wasn’t a cookie but it was something Oh yeah, there was an awareness though around it wasn’t awareness around like because she had worked so hard, And I feel like it’s because of you that I was able to be like, oh honey, like doesn’t even have anything to do with that.
Like were you, did you just feel, were you, did you enjoy your workout? Like how do your legs feel? How do your muscles feel now? What do you think they need? Like what? Like, but don’t even worry about relating it to it. Just enjoy, enjoy whatever you’re going to eat and enjoy your workout and you’re doing awesome. Something like that. But it was, yeah, I feel like that was so much of your influence over the years to like, ’cause I unlearned a lot of stuff over the years. And I will say Miss Robin I have been a member of Lindywell I wanna say, I don’t know, it’s ridiculous what I pay because I’m grandfathered in. I love that. I have been a member since I think 2016 or 2017. I became a member when I was in Mexico surfing And I got a sea urchin in my foot, like a sea urchin thingy.
I had to get it surgically removed and my friend Natalie, our co friend Natalie Borton was like, I was like dang it, I can’t jog and whatever. And she was my neighbor at the time. She’s like, that’s how I found you.
Robin:
Oh who was that?
Wendy:
It was,
Robin:
oh my gosh Natalie.
Wendy:And she said you gotta check out Robin. And that’s when I started and have never left the membership. So that’s, I think that was 2017. So that’s six years that I’ve been with you guys. So you have really influenced me not just on the maintaining health and or strength like in my body but also with just messaging and how we view things and all the things. And now I’m getting to to pass that on to my daughter.
So thank you.
Robin:
I love that And I just think that is a really important thing to consider, right? So we pay attention to our kids and the influences that are speaking into their lives, right? And the messages that they’re hearing from different things. And, we have to do the same for ourselves and it’s easy, like you said, I mean our kids watch what’s modeled right? And they see things And, we have some level we can control ourselves, right? That’s about it. We can’t control what they’re gonna see when they’re at friends’ houses. We can’t control like a lot of things. But we have our example that we set and just growing up, think of how many things you heard of like what was good or what was bad or I should do this or I shouldn’t do that as it relates to food or exercise or these different things that have just stuck with us for so long.
And you said unlearning, And, I think that is a great way to say it of unlearning some of these messages because are they actually promoting true health and what do we want the people around us to hear and learn? And so we have that opportunity and surrounding ourselves with voices that actually are gonna feed what we want to take in is really important. Whether that’s on social media or podcasts or even people we’re around day to day.
Wendy:
Yes. Yep. And like I even the messaging you’ve had over the years of like progress over perfection like that is definitely one I’ve stolen for our community. I’m like yes. Because I work with so many parents who struggle so much now as an adult because of that like perfectionism ideal, which we know is so related to shame most often. Yeah. Like that fear of not being good enough and if you get everything perfect then you’re good enough. And if you don’t like it all, is it like related to mistakes and how we were raised and all the things but but to learn that message early on. Like what do you do with that thought pattern of like I should be doing this or compare compar- comparing yourself or thinking you need to be perfect.
Like having a parent that’s a mentor for children and and young girls especially as they grow older is just such a gift. And, we cannot underestimate the power of what that will do for them as they become older and are able to have less anxiety in their life or less perfectionism, right? Because if you can master, we, none of us are ever gonna arrive fully. But we all are practicing And. we all are mastering like our own minds and our own bodies. And if you can develop that practice of having a realistic expectation of what health and wellness and what your body like, there is no shoulds but a realistic expectation of what is expected from these bodies that we live in, then that’s gonna translate to everything.
And as you get older you better believe that’ll translate to your parenting because there is no perfection in parenting. Every single one of these little souls that we raise has their own little thing that they’re gonna need their own little buttons that they push in us and it’s just all so, so related.
Robin:
So yeah, totally.
Wendy:
Well since we, we touched on like Stella’s age and like the comparison thing. Talk to me for a minute. Like we live in a world where we’re constantly consuming each other’s highlights, reels, right? Like you see this so much on Instagram, And, I, AMM, one of those people. I, I love Instagram and its ability, it’s like my chosen platform to teach and inspire and motivate young families. But also there is such a danger of like this comparison game and thinking that everyone has it together and you don’t. So how do you Robin navigate that comparison game on all fronts?
Robin:
Yeah, that’s such a good question. We’re all trying to figure that out. I think it sneaks in sneaky ways. So, I think there’s like the obvious ways and then it’s like in what ways is this seeking seeping into my thoughts where I don’t even recognize it. That’s actually what kind of freaks me out the most. But I will say one benefit that I have is being someone who uses Instagram for my brand and my business and similar to you Wendy is I thankfully recognize that highlight reel. Like it’s pretty easy to understand because I too am a person who’s posting the cute moment where I have afterschool snack ready and my kids are coming in and that’s a cute moment when everyone’s losing their mind at bedtime and throwing shoes across the room and wrestling each other and throwing fits and slamming doors.
I don’t think to grab my phone and say I’m gonna make sure I capture this moment. That would just make everything worse, right? The tantrums would escalate times 10 So I think there is that recognition of someone who views as the platform And. we can even turn that back. Even if you don’t use it for your brand or business and recognize nobody is showing the full story. I do, I try to combat that in the sense of I try to turn around and show some real moments or even yesterday I posted this. I had a wonderful morning, I got, I did pilates, I got in my sauna that I have, I did a little like meditation, like it had all the things right And, it was great.
And I posted it really quickly and then I thought oh my gosh, it’s so important to make sure that And I kept got back on and said, I have not been able to do this for over 10 years. ’cause I’ve had little ones in the house, breastfeeding tantrums. I mean our youngest are still five. The only reason I got through that moment was because three of ’em were watching a show. They’re a little older and my husband was helping with the other one. So like recognizing seasons in ourselves can help us to then also not compare to the other people we might be following And I think that’s something that I do talk about in the book in terms of seasons. Seasons are so important to recognize just because someone is doing something or has looks like they have it all together or they’re on this trip or they have this perfect morning routine and you’re sitting there covered in spit up, haven’t showered in three days, someone’s crying at your feet, you’re trying to cook dinner, whatever it is, recognizing that you’re in a season is so helpful and it’s hard when you’re in that season and someone else might be in a different season.
So I think anytime we can apply this seasons filter to us, it’s very helpful. And also be aware of who you consume and what you consume. Unfollow mute, if you notice this seeping into your health and wellbeing, take control of it. I have had times where I’m following people and something about it just like it’s bugging me. I’m like, if I’m thinking about this after the fact after I’ve closed the app, that is a huge problem. This person I don’t even know is taking up headspace in my life. That’s when it’s crossed the line. Like unfollow. Yeah, unmute. Whatever you need to do to protect your peace and your wellbeing. And even in the book we talk about digital boundaries and digital health as well.
So maybe even good some fasts from social media or either I, in the book I have kind of three options, the light version, the medium version or the full on detox version so you can kind of pick where you’re at. But this is a component of health that no one’s really talking about. We talk about macros, we talk about workout, but what about our digital health and wellbeing? So it has to be addressed if we truly wanna be well in mind and body.
Wendy:
Absolutely. Yeah. This digital piece, it’s like it’s, it’s quite the conundrum. It really is. We’re as business owners of this And I mean the power is so beautiful and the life changing education and inspiration, And, I do look at the world and I’m like, oh God, what is happening? What are we? But it, it’s easy for me to get dark with it because it is like I see the brain is changing and it’s like it really needs to be a huge part of families. And, I have So, I mean of like what they’re teaching and and their weekly practice to like maintain healthy boundaries and continue to teach and teach and yeah, I just have so many families who come to me and they are in such a deep dark zone and a lot of it is like the technology stuff has just gotten so outta control and the boundaries are really, they don’t get the message soon enough that the kids really shouldn’t have a phone before high school And.
It just becomes really hard. But yeah, the digital wellness is something that every, all of us not should be, but we want to prioritize that as something that is worth looking at. And yeah, that good idea. And it back to that
Robin:
All or nothing, right? It doesn’t have to be all or nothing. You were saying like we, we wanna be perfect or we think like we have to have or like whatever we’ve lost like just no boundaries. Let it go because I don’t know how to get a handle on it. So, I love that you always provide that sometimes little changes little can make a huge impact. Like something as simple as putting your phone away after dinner and not getting on social media the rest of the night. Something like that. It’s actually hard to do for most people. Like because oh my gosh, habits of picking it up at the end of the day. But we could do that, right? Something even two hours and even if you have to put it in there, you have to put it on airplane mode.
You have to close your closet door, like whatever you have to do to get the phone away from you. But that small change can actually have a profound impact on how you end your day, how well you sleep, your anxiety, the way you feel the next day when you wake up. So even small changes can have a huge impact in this area. We don’t have to throw technology away altogether or disappear from it in or order to have a healthier relationship with it.
Wendy:
And that is so at the core of so much of your messaging and it’s like I feel like I need you talking to me every day to remind me of that because I am such a type A go-getter perfectionism – perfectionist and an entrepreneur to my course So. I feel like I’m gonna invite, I’m gonna invent the cell phone. Like safe. Yeah. Okay. Nobody steal it or I’m gonna race whoever’s listening. It’s trying to try to go invent this to production on this because I’m telling you this is, it is intense to watch the neural pathways that are getting paved in our brains with these devices and Totally. Oh my gosh it is so intense. And. it is so fast. And. it is so thick. ’cause I mean we’ve had these devices I think for in California I I wanna say it’s 20 years or something.
Is that about right? Since the iPhone? Yes. Maybe 24 or something. Yeah. But that fast for society to change and be that addicted, right? But like it’s almost like you need a safe that like tricks you and you cannot open or like you can’t, you have to go to such extreme to get that thing out. Terry And, I recently got Apple watches ’cause we’re on a quest to put the phones away at night and it’s definitely not, we’re not there yet. Yeah. And, we had ’em for like four months. And. we just keep returning back and trying again because yeah, we just keep thinking like if we can plug these in the office and model to our children, like not to pick it up. ’cause every time, you know think about like, oh I didn’t let the doctor know that she needs to cancel.
Robin:
Totally – it’s little things. I need to order groceries. Yeah I need to add a note about that thing. And then all of a sudden you’re like opening the next app before your brain even realizes you’re doing it.
Wendy:
Our brain is never resting wild. Right?
Robin:
It’s wild. And so that when we even think of that And I went through a season, I share about this in the book, but I went through a season of burnout. You could call it all different kinds of things. But how, okay, I believe there is an epidemic of this. Yes. Among women. And I was in adrenal burnout. Again it’s not the technical term, it’s HPA Axis dysfunction and dysregulation. But a lot of times people refer to it as adrenal fatigue or adrenal burnout.
Wendy:
Yeah.
Robin:
I went through this whole thing. And I – every friend that I’ve talked to, I mean almost every Me too. Me too. I’m dealing with that too. Me too. Yeah, me too. Me too, me too. It’s across the board. And one of the things I had to get really serious about ’cause I did not feel stressed, I did not feel like, oh I’m a stressed out person every day I’m pulling out my hair. I’m so overwhelmed. I actually didn’t feel that way. I was actually Functioning high Functioning because that’s what our bodies actually can do. My body was pumping so much cortisol that it was supporting me. I was like, I can do this, I can do this, I can do this. Until I couldn’t anymore And my body was like, we actually can’t sustain this so we’re gonna actually take all your cortisol away and just drop it down.
And then I’m like, oh I’m really tired. What’s happening? But one of, I had to look at some of the small things that were draining my energy. Like I had no silence in my day. I had no time for my brain to rest. I was in this sympathetic nervous system most of the day. So because that would go from parenting, like high stress, baby crying, toddler tantrum. Oh gotta get groceries before lunch. Okay, school pickup is coming. Okay, I gotta respond to that work email. Oh, someone texted me. Okay, now when I have a minute I’m gonna open my phone when I wanna just chill for a second and I’m gonna scroll social media.
Well our brain is still input, input, input, right? Yeah. And processing. And it’s keeping us in this elevated state And So I had to look at some of these small habits and go, when do I ever have any pockets of silence or when do I ever have a moment that I let my brain just do nothing? And it is hard to do. But I had to, I started nothing in the car. Like no podcasts, no music. When I would nurse my baby, I would not bring my phone. And. I would just sit there. Yeah. And think no reading, no nothing. Like just having to put some of these practices into place to get my nervous system back into a state of where it can heal and come down from the stimulus.
Robin:
And so for parents that’s like very real because we’re so stimulated by just the act of parenting all day long.
Wendy:
Yeah. That was such a good episode by the way that you did about your health journey. And how are you feeling now Robin? ’cause it’s been like a year since you put out that episodes been and found all that right? It was it been two. And how are you feeling?
Robin:
I am feeling so much better now. I will say I still have to be very mindful, very aware and of when I’m gonna go past my limit or when I’m gonna start ignoring my body’s signals. Because yeah, it’s my natural tendency and having four kids in a business, it’s just like you do what you gotta do. But I’m feeling so, so much better. I make it through the day without having the afternoon crash. My mysterious aches and pains and my joints have disappeared. So, so much better. But here’s the thing, with all health and wellbeing, I have to keep work. I have to keep my practices and keep doing it. It’s not like I feel better now I’m done.
Now it’s like I have to keep implementing these new routines and habits, which much of which are again in this book I was feeling so frustrated by a lot of the fitness industry and health industry that it was basically ignoring the fact that so many of us are stressed and if we are in a stressed out state, if we keep adding stress to our body through exercise, ’cause exercise actually is a form of stress, right? It is a stress on the body. And that is a good thing if we can apply a certain, if we’re in a healthy state, we can apply stress to the body. Therefore our body has to recover And, we recover stronger. If you’re in a healthier state, that’s a great thing. Yeah. When you are not in a healthy state, when you’re in a state of burnout, which I was doing and you’re pushing your body with exercise, well my body could not recover.
So. I was actually doing more harm than good with the types of workouts. I was doing these kind of high intensity workouts and then not having the adequate rest and not having the adequate food support to nourish my body. So these things, it’s when it comes to how we are approaching our health and wellbeing, we kind of have to come at it from a different lens these days than we did maybe back in the nineties. Because we have a different lifestyle.
Wendy:
Yeah. It’s so true. And that’s what I love about Lindywell is like you really, you have the like nutrition side, like food is, medicine is like part of your program. Do you talk about nutrition in the book?
Robin:
I do in a very non-prescriptive way, but in a way that is how can we look at food as nourishment? Yeah. And how can we enjoy food again and how can we break free from some of these fears and these negative associations around food. Because when we are in that, again, we’re in that sympathetic state, we’re in this stressed out state, So I do talk about food and talk about inflammation and how to start to use food as a tool to reduce that inflammation. So it’s not in a way that’s like follow this diet. Yeah. Or this is keto or this is that, but it’s, it can apply regardless of your food preferences or dietary needs. If that makes sense.
Wendy:
Yes. That totally makes sense. And Lindywell has the best recipes ever so it’s so good. Yeah, it’s interesting like hearing about your journey to become healthy and Yeah, I’m definitely in a season where I’m like just questioning a lot And as a business owner we all know like whether you have parenting is like this really intense and a season or your business is really intense. Like it, it is wild how your body will scream at you. And mine’s screaming right now. Just yesterday the family was laughing but I’m like serious about it. We were at the beach as we always are. And I always say to the lifeguards or I always say, I’m like, you know what, in a different life I’d be a lifeguard.
I just wanna like, like imagine that babe. ’cause we’re both like part fish surfers all the things and I’m like mad they just stare at the ocean. Like they’re not thinking. We know as business owners and parents like yes your mind is. And then you combine the digital age of technology. Yes. And order groceries online. You buy everything is online. Which again I love. Yes.
Robin:
Huge blessing.
Wendy:
And, at the same time, my body is screaming at me that it wants me to back up. Right? So it’s like I’m in this season where I’m like, okay, how am I gonna do this? How’s it gonna look? And from a leadership perspective, from running an organization, I love this organization but I like spent a lot of time researching last night. I’m like, oh I really could become a lifeguard and take the entire summer off and be a lifeguard for three months at
Robin:
Yeah.
Wendy:
In my mid forties. And I. I would pass that test, I would kill it. And I’m seriously considering it because I’m just,
Robin:
I can’t wait for you to do this.
Wendy:
I know I might do it Robin. It’s a little wild. But at the same time my body is screaming.
Robin:
No but it’s like a sabbatical. Yes. It’s like a sabbatical from your lifestyle to go do something completely different. Yeah. And give yourself some time to restore and Heal.
Wendy:
I know. And we’re at the point now where our organization is like my team is the dream team. And I could still do my coaching every week and create a little bit of content to help new families but, but I’m like yeah I might do it. So one of those things that I’m like, that’d be awesome when I’m 90. If I’m like, remember when I like became a lifeguard in my mid forties.
Robin:
Love that.
Wendy:
And I retired at 60.
Robin:
Yes I love it.
Wendy:
But you see like it’s the idea of the blank brain for eight hours. Like you have walkie talkie
Robin:
Yeah.
Wendy:
And you’re running in and out but there’s no digitalness. Right. And it And there go is a little bit of my all or nothing So. I have to be careful, right? Because talking do I come all and go on the beach?
Robin:
Yeah. I’ve been doing a couple of things and this might be helpful for any working parents out there And. it depends on your situation. But I’ve been even trying to look at, okay, we run these digital businesses. I’m on Zoom all day. I will be on Zoom sometimes for eight hours. So, I have really been making it a point to take as many walking calls as I can. And I’ve been telling my team I like that. I’m like, are you good if we just go off Zoom and just do a phone call and we’ll both go out for a walk? And it’s been great because it’s actually been like, they’re like, oh yeah, I would actually like that too. So they’ll see, you know, you bring your notepad, you know they’ll text me their little agenda so we have it on text to look at, but then we’re just walking and talking and yeah we can, you can always make notes in your phone or on a notepad while you’re walking.
But it has been very helpful to break up the day in the week. Even just a few times a week. Not just for me but also for my team. So just trying to get even creative with in this digital world how to get up from our screens or get off this the, they’re sometimes just even looking at the screen is what can really drain us.
Wendy:
So that’s such a good idea. And yeah that’s, I mean I know you can’t do it for your students because they’re doing Pilates, And, I mean I guess they could do listening only they wouldn’t have to look at the screen. But it’s helpful to look at you when you’re teaching and and your amazing teachers that you have in the program. But, but for me, I could really make sure I’m encouraging people. ’cause I always tell them, you can listen to our lessons and coaching calls and all the things like while you’re doing laundry or dishes. But now that’s a great piece of advice to make sure everyone remembers that. Go take a walk. Like go take a walk.
Robin:
Yeah, I’ll do that and just listen I’ll that I’ll take online courses and programs and listen to the audio and just put it in my little fanny pack. You don’t often miss, there might be slides or things sometimes, but just listening and getting moving. Yeah, sometimes that’s actually gonna help your brain retain more information anyways so
Wendy:
yeah, it’s true. Yeah. Yeah. And one more thing I was gonna say about that and then we’ll wrap their hours almost up. But the idea of like starting small is again something that you’ve inspired me so much over the years to really embody. But I thought of how I was teaching Stella that a little bit with like we got obviously this digital piece of wellness is very vague so we’ve gone off a little bit on it. But when she was, I was talking to her about just like the social apps and things and my concern and teaching her like what I want for her, right? I’m always advocating when I teach my kids like here’s what I want when it comes to wellness that here’s what I want your brain to be able to function and and operate as you continue on with high school.
And she was saying, well mom, it’s just realistic right now. Like this helps. Sometimes I do just wanna relax after being at volleyball. It was actually a night where she was babysitting And, we were hanging out, I had brought her dinner and she was just kind of wanting to scroll for a little bit. And I was, you know, going into my mom teaching mode and she was like, mom, just sometimes you just, it’s okay, you just wanna relax. And I’m like, okay, but here’s the thing I just want you to do as a small step is just be aware of how your body feels. Ah. Like if you have some things that you watch or the funny things that you see that you’re like, oh my gosh, it makes you giggle, it makes you laugh. And just start the process now of your awareness around when it feels yucky and when you even have a thought that’s like, oh my gosh, like she’s so pretty and I’m not, or like her body, oh my God, like she has abs, And, I don’t like even the thought of it or even like a icky like I should be going to the gym right now and instead I’m sitting on my phone.
That’s just build the awareness now and it’s not like you have to like unfollow them because that sounds like it’s just a big thing for kids. Like they’re like, you can never unfollow anybody. They will know. I’m like really? But that’s okay. But just the awareness piece, right? Like if again, the small steps of teaching children. ’cause nobody told me, nobody taught me that when I was little. To be aware of how my body body feels when I’m consuming right information. Whether it was a magazine or a movie or tv. But like just think of that’s a small step that you can take to teach your kids.
Robin:
I absolutely, yes. I love that you’re doing that And, I’m taking literally notes for myself in that with my kids And we are not quite in that stage yet, but we will be. And the same that applies for our children can apply for us. Right. Just be I beginning to ask that question. ’cause we weren’t taught that growing up. Like what, how do I feel in my body or what, just being aware of the thoughts, what that thought just popped up for me about this. That applies for us as adults too, right? Yeah. Just as much when we are then all of a sudden we go down some kind of spiral so quickly how we can do that in our brain of I should be doing this or I could be a better parent or I don’t look like that and blah blah blah blah blah.
So same is true for us.
Wendy:
Their kids are able to sit through dinner and mine aren’t.
Robin:
Right. Right. That was just that magical moment they caught on camera.
Wendy:
Yes, exactly. Robin, you are such a delight to hang out with and spend time with. Thank you so much for taking time out of your day to be with us today. Tell listeners where they can find this amazing book this week. I’m sure it’s everywhere, but where should listeners go get your book and tell listeners just everywhere they can find you and come support you and Lindywell,
Robin:
Oh, thank you. I, it’s such an honor to be here. I love your your podcast, so it’s an honor to be a guest. And yes, you can find the book everywhere books are sold. So you can go to Amazon or Barnes and Noble, but you can also just go to Lindywell.com and click there and we’ll have a spot where you can also find all the retailers, where you can find your books, you can support whatever store you like to support. And you can find me on Instagram. We have two accounts, so the Lindywell account is @wearelindywell. And then I also have a personal account @RobinMarieLong, so I’d love for you to come say hi and let me know if you came from the Fresh Start family, because I love this community.
Robin:
And, I, love the work that’s happening here as well.
Wendy:
Oh, awesome Robin. Well thank you so much. Listeners, go find Robin, go support her with her new book and thanks again for being here, Robin. Thank you.
For links and more info about everything we talked about in today’s episode. Head to freshstartfamilyonline.com/195.
Stella:
For more information, go to freshstartfamilyonline.com. Thanks for listening, families, have a great day.
