How My Daughter’s Strong Will Probably Helped Save Her Life (Reflections on the Scariest Day of My Life – A Decade Later)

by | November 2, 2017 | 1 comment

How My Daughter’s Strong Will Probably Helped Save Her Life (Reflections on the Scariest Day of My Life – A Decade Later)

by | November 2, 2017 | 1 comment

Today in the Snyder household, we’re celebrating one of the scariest days of my life…November 2nd, 2007…when we welcomed our first baby, Stella Blanche Snyder into the world.

Why was it so scary? Let me explain.

It started off great, contractions and laboring at home. Things progressing just like they should, check. Waiting till the 5, 1, 1 rule was happening, check. We made the trek to the hospital at midnight…it was a wild ride, but all good. Arrived safe & checked in, check. Made it to almost 7 dilation, time for some pain relief…epidural, check. Things were going just as we had planned. That’s how parenting goes right? Always just as planned? Ha, a new decade of humbleness began that night for us for sure.

As the hours progressed, things started to unravel. Progression slowed down & even though I spent hours and hours pushing, my little girl did NOT want to come out. My body became stressed and so did hers, and that’s when things got REALLY scary.

My usually calm, soft spoken 5 foot 1 inch sweet doctor all of a sudden changed. “Uh oh” I heard, followed by “She’s hemeroging”….and before I could really understand fully what was going on, the whole room’s energy changed.

My doctor informed me that we’d need to rush me into emergency surgery as I was bleeding profusely from a torn placenta & that “This was serious.” Her calm tone became authoritative and rushed as she informed the nurses of the next steps. I was rushed into the operating room and surgery began within minutes. I had let the anasteshia wear off in hopes it would help me get my baby girl out, so as they started cutting my tummy, I began to scream. I could feel the scalpel. With the anesthesiolomissing (busy on another floor with another patient), they were forced to put me under general anestesia. I was out cold as my baby was yanked to safety from my belly.

The next thing I knew, I woke up to my smiling hubby, holding our new baby girl. I think I looked at him and said “WTF, am I ok? Is the baby ok?” and after he assured me everyone was fine, he asked me if I’d like to hold my daughter. As I processed his question, my shoulder started to have an extreme pain radiating throughout my arm. I mentioned it and the nurse said “Oh, that’s an awful side effect that some have from the surgery, let me give you some medicine.” She added additional pain killer to my IV and I was out cold once again.

Hours later, I awoke again, and this time finally got to hold my little girl.

She was ok.

I was ok.

But holy smokes, what the hell had just happened?

We were so new as parents, that the wholeness of the experience really didn’t sink in till years later. The reality of what my daughter and I had survived and how the unique qualities that God designed her (and I) with probably helped us both survive that fearful night.

You see, we’ve had a few friends who went through similar situations, but experienced horrible tragedy. A baby girl lost during childbirth due to a freak umbilical cord tangle & another family who’s baby made it, but beautiful momma did not. Heartbreaking and true. All within the last 5 years. Friends in our community. So many around the world experience horrible tragedy at childbirth, even amidst the modern world’s exceptional medicine and hospitals.

Years later, as I reflect on this story, I’m overwhelmed with gratitude.

By God’s grace, we made it through.

Bringing this story to the front of my mind (and heart) brings such a heavy rush of emotions and tears of release. Tears of gratitude that God designed my baby girl EXACTLY like he wanted her.

Because I truly believe that he knew her story & knew she would need extreme grit, strength, courage, tenacity & persistence to make it through such a horrendous entrance to the world. There’s elements of his story that are way over all of our heads, beyond our pay grade, that we’ll never understand. I ache for babies who were lost & mommas who weren’t as lucky as I was, but I also accept the gift God graced me with and proclaim my gratitude abundantly.

The same qualities that can make some days a challenge with my daughter are probably the qualities that saved her life, because this little girl came onto this earth a firecracker.

From Day 1, we could tell we had a wild one. An outspoken, out of the box, sensitive, yet super tough little girl. From the beginning, we could SEE this in her. From the colicky months (please stop crying baby girl, please!!!) to the persistent early toddler years (she was so on her own mission & leading US along the journey), to her late toddler years (when I truly questioned if I was going to “eat my young”, you know like insects do?) to kindergarten (a few kids in her class were NOT fans of her competitive drive) to her current tween thang (attitude, attitude, attitude that I’m sure every tween girl goes through).

She was always the definition of STRONG WILL and even though we had NO IDEA what to do with it when she was a toddler (until we found the work of Positive Parenting), I now see it so clearly why it is SUCH a blessing and my absolute FAVORITE thing about her.

The same little girl that wasn’t giving up a decade ago in that scary, stressed, hurried, and intense hospital is the same little girl who doesn’t give up on what she wants today.

  • Does she push back a lot? Yes. (We joke she’d make an incredible lawyer)
  • Does she really go for things when she wants something. Yes! (she just got the lead in her school play after practicing for hours upon hours)
  • Is she incredibly strong?. Yes. (You should see her on the beach volleyball court or in the ocean)
  • Is she insanely courageous? Yes. (Check her out at The House of Blues on the drums here playing for a crowd of nearly 1000)
  • Does she sometimes push her brother out of the way to be first to get fro yo? Yes. (The competition is fierce in that girl!)
  • Does she argue back about limits sometimes. Yes! (She is an intense negotiator)

But even though those things make up SOME of who she is, the other half also defines her.

  • The goodness inside of her is abundant
  • She’s an incredible friend to her buddies
  • She has an incredible work ethic at school & respects her teachers highly
  • She’s gracious & giving on the playground, helping special needs kids as a SOAR program leader
  • She’s extremely courageous on stage as the leader in front of large crowds (whether she’s singing, drumming, or acting, she is so comfortable up there)
  • She’s hilarious, funny & usually “the life of the party!”
  • And she loves animals like no other (even her wild, obnoxious new puppy who consistently steals & slobbers her stuffies)


So today, I’m throwing up epic praise & hugging on this little wild child extra hard because a decade as her Mom is the greatest gift. I wouldn’t change her for ANYTHING.

Radical little girls unite…you ALL are awesome & a blessing to this earth.

And parents, if you have little wild childs of your own, TRUST me that this work will help you see the light in them & that one day you’ll look back & cherish the traits that you once cursed. Hang in there & stay supported. Learn new tools about how to work with power personalities and healthy methods to influence them.

Learn more about how Positive Parenting Curriculum can transform your life through these Fresh Start Family programs

1 Comment


    Amazing story! So happy the light in this little firecracker shines so bright!! Thanks for sharing!! Happy Birthday Stella!! ?


Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.